Eminem - The Real Slim Shady

[00:02.78] May I have your attention, please [00:05.68] May I have your attention, please [00:08.20] Will the real Slim Shady, please stand up [00:11.43] I repeat, will the real Slim Shady, please stand up [00:16.37] We're gonna have a problem here [00:17.86] Ya'll act like you never seen, a white person before [00:19.96] Jaws all on the floor, like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door [00:22.81] And started whoopin' her ass, worse than before [00:24.94] They first were divorced, throwin' her over furniture (Ahh) [00:26.82] It's the return of the, oh wait, no way, you're kidding [00:29.47] He didn't just say, what I think he did, did he [00:32.11] And said, nothing you idiots [00:34.35] Dr. Dre's dead he's locked in my basement (Haha) [00:36.99] Feminist women love Eminem [00:38.43] Chicka-chicka-chicka Slim Shady, I'm sick of him [00:40.40] Look at him, walkin' around, grabbin' his you know what [00:42.95] Flippin' to you know who, yeah but he's so cute though [00:45.26] Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose [00:48.11] But no worse, than what's goin' on in your parents bedrooms (Eh-eh-eh) [00:50.68] Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't [00:53.17] But it's cool for Tom Green, to hump a dead moose [00:55.19] My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips [00:57.11] And if I'm lucky you might, just give it a little kiss [00:59.40] And that's the message, that we deliver to little kids [01:01.52] And expect them not to know, what a woman's clitoris is [01:03.89] Of course they're gonna know what intercourse is [01:05.86] By the time they hit fourth grade, they got the Discovery Channel don't they [01:08.43] We ain't nothing but mammals, well some of us are cannibals [01:11.73] Who cut other people open like cantaloupes [01:13.55] But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes [01:15.60] Then there's no reason that a man, and another man can't elope (Eww) [01:18.11] But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote [01:19.94] Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes [01:22.30] I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady [01:24.54] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating [01:26.62] So won't the real Shady, please stand up [01:29.07] Please stand up, please stand up [01:31.41] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady [01:33.83] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating [01:36.02] So won't the real Shady, please stand up [01:38.43] Please stand up, please stand up [01:40.51] don't gotta cuss in his raps, to sell records [01:42.94] Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too [01:45.28] You think I give a damn about a Grammy [01:47.20] Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me [01:50.08] But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird [01:52.28] Why, so you guys can just lie to get me here [01:54.55] So you can, sit me here next to [01:56.44] Shit, better switch me chairs [01:58.99] So I can sit next to Carson Daly and [02:01.24] And hear 'em argue over, who she gave head to first [02:03.61] Little bitch put me on blast, on MTV [02:05.69] Yeah he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hehe [02:08.25] I should download her audio, on MP3 [02:10.32] And show the whole world, how you gave Eminem VD (Ahh) [02:12.72] I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me [02:15.74] So I have been sent here, to destroy you [02:17.79] And there's a million of us just like me [02:19.64] Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me [02:21.99] Who dress like me, walk talk and act like me [02:24.04] And just might be, the next best thing, but not quite me [02:26.74] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady [02:29.00] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating [02:31.09] So won't the real Shady, please stand up [02:33.65] Please stand up, please stand up [02:35.94] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady [02:38.11] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating [02:40.23] So won't the real Shady, please stand up [02:42.67] Please stand up, please stand up [02:44.95] I'm like a head trip to listen to, 'cause I'm only giving you [02:47.45] Things you joke about with your friends, inside your livin' room [02:49.70] The only difference is I got the balls to say it, in front of ya'll [02:52.46] And I don't gotta be false, or sugar-coat it at all [02:54.40] I just get on the mic and spit it [02:56.49] And whether you like to admit it, [(Rip)] I just shit it [02:58.46] Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can [03:00.68] Then you wonder how can kids, eat up these albums like valiums it's funny [03:03.87] 'Cause at the rate I'm going, when I'm thirty [03:06.02] I'll be the only person, in the nursing home flirting [03:08.02] Pinching nurses asses, while I'm jackin' off with Jergens [03:10.37] And I'm jerkin', but this whole bag of Viagra isn't workin' [03:12.56] In every single person there's a slim shady lurkin' [03:14.74] who could be workin' at Burger King, spittin' on your onion rings [03:17.36] Or in the parking lot circling, screamin' I don't give a fuck [03:20.11] With his windows down, and his system up [03:22.36] So will the real Shady, please stand up [03:24.28] And put one of those fingers, on each hand up [03:26.36] And be proud to be outta your mind, and outta control [03:28.55] And one more time loud as you can, how's it go [03:30.83] I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady [03:33.24] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating [03:35.40] So won't the real Shady, please stand up [03:37.88] Please stand up, please stand up [03:40.14] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady [03:42.39] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating [03:44.43] So won't the real Shady, please stand up [03:47.18] Please stand up, please stand up [03:49.21] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady [03:51.56] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating [03:53.85] So won't the real Shady, please stand up [03:56.46] Please stand up, please stand up [03:58.62] 'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady [04:01.25] All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating [04:03.23] So won't the real Shady, please stand up [04:05.42] Please stand up, please stand up [04:07.74] Haha, guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us [04:12.90] Fuck it, let's all stand up [04:15.93]